the dream at 4:20AM

its about 4:20AM when i am starting to write this blog, but i couldnt let this dream escape my mind without me writing down some remembrance of it, ive never had a dream this intense and this real to me.

the start of the dream was, it was a normal day in life, no work or school on this particular day, so i woke up around 9:00AM (dont ask), then all of my friends the sick six which we were called the summer of 08' they came barging in my room, all dressed in suits and looking real spiffy, they all say in unison but in their own voice "dude what are you doing get up you got to get ready for your wedding!" and suddenly i do remember its my wedding day. so im like ahhhh shit! thanks for waking me up guys outta the way i gotta take my shower (it was so vivid, i could feel the warmth of the water on my body and the smell of the soap as i applied it to my body)...after the shower i dry off in the matter of seconds considering that im in a rush. i put on a fresh pair of boxers and a fresh wife beater i run into my room only to find my tux already laid out on my bed freshly dry cleaned and the sick six eagerly waiting for me to get dressed so we could roll to the church...i tell them ok guys as soon as i put this on we will head to the church...so i throw it on as fast as i can and i go gel my hair making sure every spike is perfectly vertical and straight on. then as we arrive at the church suddenly Kim pops into my mind and how beautiful she must look...then out of nowhere Lawrence pulls up with his G ride and he has the song by Wiz Khalifa - Say Yeah, bumpin and im like wussup!? and he said this is for our group get us hyped up nah mean? and all of a sudden we all break out in a dance, im not sure who was doing what but i know i was doing a dance style known as "shuffling" and some were C-walking, some were gliding haha it was pretty epic but on with teh story. so after we were all done dancing my mom comes out and says are you ready moudy (my nick name) so i stand at the alter with my best homies at my side. and the here comes the bride melody starts to chime in and this whole time im thinking omg omg what if she has cold feet, what if she doesnt come? what if she had a change of heart? then as all relief comes to me i see a glimpse of my bride to be being walked down the aisle by her mother. she has a beautiful long white gown on and the veil over her face, but you can hear her faint sounds of tears as she lets go of her mothers hand she comes to meet me in the middle. all of sudden its like WARP SPEED, we go to the part where i need to put this HUGE DIAMOND ring on her finger so we exchange rings, and he says if you accept this woman to be your wife say i do, so we go through all the motions and when it was time to reveal the face of my bride, i put the veil back and i see the beautiful face of Kim, i can see she has tears in her eyes, and i could hear my mother sobbing in the background, as he says you may kiss the bride, i look into her eyes as if i were saying i love you silently and i close my eyes and kiss her, as we kiss the world seemed to be on hold, nothing mattered, no sound, no motion, no air, everything was set to "pause" as our lips departed from one another everything went back to normal time, but when we opened our eyes we were on our honey moon already... and our song is playing, the first song we had ever slow danced to which was KC and JoJo - All My Life, she comes close to me as i hold her by her waist, and she says "see babe, i told you i would never hurt you, we've been through so much together, i love you forever"...and we kissed and i woke up....

i guess what this dream is trying to tell me is that, when Kim said she wanted to be in a serious relationship with me, she really meant it, and that i finally found somebody who wont hurt me. well that is all i can remember from my dream for this night....until later good night


i love you kim <3

craig<3kim

ego

i have come to realize, that i have one of the biggest egos ever -__- haha, i mean its not a bad thing or a good thing but its just part of my personality... there are many things that influence this upon me. for one thing i will mention which is first i will mention that last. but running up in second place is my car, the 2000 pearl white honda prelude, i take a lot of pride in owning that car, it might not be the fastest or the sexiest, but i certainly make it fast and make it look as clean as i can. its also a lot more rare than a integra, or a civic, everyone and there mother had or has one. but the prelude depending on the area, like for example where i live, only a handful of people have one. then comes third, the guys i used to run with has got that mentality in me that everyone is human and we are all the same, so we should walk on the same level as everyone else. and my family is also a part of it, i got one of the most broken down, but more than likely the most powerful banded together of them all, we got each others back no matter what goes down. my current friends also influence this feeling, i know they got my back when i need it the most. but FIRST PLACE GOES TO THE GIRL OF MY DREAMS. Kimberly Elisabeth Sing Ip. she is the one that keeps me smiling all day long, and makes me think of brighter times if im having a gloomy day of my own. if im ever sad or not doing too well i know i can count on her to bring my mood up, even if im having a normal day, and i call her, when i hear her answer the phone i get a little smirk on my face...but how she influences my ego is every guy thinks they're girlfriend is beautiful but she surpasses all the others walking around out there. it sounds really bad but im not saying shes my trophy girlfriend, but in class we were talking about status, and feeling of your significant other, like "oh look who i have under my arm" and its true, in some places people will look at your mate and straight up judge. but i mean who wouldnt be confident if you have a pretty girlfriend, like who cares what he/she thinks about me, i know whats true and so does my mate. i have the best girlfriend ever no doubt, its not about her clothes, not about the money, not about the =X (haha), its about how she makes me feel, and the way she treats me, she will never know how much i love her, and what ill do or sacrifice for us<3. well i gotta go get ready to work and eat a little before. so ill probably continue more at work, till then seeya in a few hours blog...


craig<3Kim

realize my eomtions

for as long as i can remember ive been one of the more "chill people of the group'' that was up until the end of my senior year in highschool, i had the world going the way i wanted to, getting good grades, awesome friends, family was finally calming down, and what i thought was a faithful girl. i used to just sit back and relax when she would ask me if she could go and have fun, i thought meh a little fun what can it hurt? little did i know the answer was me. everything was going good till the study abroad program came up that following summer. so i thought oh cool what a great opportunity for her shes so lucky, so i bid her a farewell and off she went to china. i used to stay up till 3 talk for 15 mins and then wake up 6 for another 15 mins, she roomed with two guys who were pretty close, then she talked to me about going clubbing and having fun, oh sure go ahead, what could it hurt right?.....wrong.... she went clubbing, and in her words her friend "regulated" the guys...yyeeaahh rriigghhtt, then they all went to kareoke and they started to have some drinks, and some more and some more...thats when my first insecurity issues became big and noticeable after she cheated on me, but i was like she was fucked up, in more than one way, maybe i could put that behind me and keep it moving, well that worked for a while, till i got lied too, lied to my face...

and now i always have the thoughts of what if, but i need to open up my small little asian eyes and see i have a good and faithful girl who isnt going to hurt me, and that has a life, i just dont need to be in it or talking to her 24/7 365, everyone needs their

happy birthday law!

happy birthday big homie!, i dont think you will remember tonight HHAHAHAH

weddings =)

im sitting here next to my ladyyyy in a church, waiting for her friend james to get married, great guy, very nice, props to you homie =)

~youre the man today good luck to you and Naomi

craig<3kim

the silence of my eyes

just felt like posting on my day off, just relaxing at home with the a/c going feeling really nice in here, and for some reason, i came up with a quote, that probably someone already made up but i didnt really find anything on it so here it goes, the quote that popped in my head was "the most powerful words can be said through silence." i believe that it is so true, i stand behind that 110%, ill give you an example, lets say when you are with your gf, and you guys are under the starry night sky and just hugging and you look into her eyes, and you know that she is all yours and she loves you with the deepest of her heart, or it doesnt only have to be about love, it can also be about anger, or rage, if you were about to get down with someone and you guys size each other up and stare em down, you can tell in their eyes or in yours that they are there to win and mean business. i say this because i remember talking with my friends and they said their gf's always said "if you say i love you" too much too often it may loose its meaning", which i can see where they are coming from, i dont think i love you should be tossed around as an everyday thing with your significant other. i think that even if they dont say it, doesnt necessarily mean that they dont love you or love you any less, it should be already in your mind that they love you to one extent or the other. i know that if i look into the eyes of my T-Rex ^_^ that i will see all i need that will reassure me that she mine and only mine, and at the end of the night no matter how drastic or how dramatic it may be, she will always come back to me<3..


Craig<3Kim