Christmas has arrived and departed...

Today is the day, that all of our hard earned money that was spent is supposed to light up the eyes of those who have received the gifts....but to be honest, now that im older, all that i know is just material things that you could just buy later, or on your own...which is why i dont know why people get so angry about who spent more on who, or who got the better version of this and that...material can always be bought, but love and affection, that is something that is given from the heart, and that is something no matter how much in the world you offer, or how much money you make, that can never be bought, that is something that you must receive with genuine feeling.

I know that my family doesnt have as much money as we used to back in the day, due to family problems, and my mom, she only bought me a couple of shirts and some chocolate from see's candies and man i was so happy i finally got to eat my most favorite candies from that store, and she got me a pair of shoes, i remember when i was younger she used to shower me and my older sister with presents, but now i realize that money is hard to come by when youre a single parent and you have to support yourself and a child with only one persons income.

i am just thankful that on today, i have the things that really do matter to me, family, and friends, with those two combined, i dont need material to keep me smiling, but with all that being said, i had one of the best Christmases in my life, thank you for all the great presents i have received today and they will not be taken for granted <3

A Merry Christmas To All And To All A Goodnight!


Craig♥Kim

AVATAR IN 3D

ONE OF THE SICKEST MOVIES I HAVE EVER SEEN!

polaroids

woke up randomly and thought about this, a pictures is worth a thousand words, or a thousand pictures can be worth one word, as you can see from my picture above. no matter how many pictures you combine of one even or people, for example me and kim, it will always come down to us being happy, and acceptance for who the other person is, although we may be different in many many ways, we always resort to making the other person being happy in more ways than any person can think of....i just randomly woke up and i have work soon. so farewell for now and goodnight and sweet dreams..



craig <3 Kim

Last Christmas!

yes its that time of year again, a time to be jolly!, and oh how happy i am right now!, well besides the fact that finals are upon all students but anyway thats off the topic....

Last Christmas is playing right now, i love this song and next song on the play list is all i want for christmas, and this year i am just so thankful to meet all the new people and stay in touch with all my old friends, although i feel like everyone has gone there separate ways and didnt look back i know that they are still around here somewhere, and maybe its just a whole chunk of life and growing up. i know deep down that i can really depend on one person to always be there if i really needed her, say im whipped, say im sprung, say....im in love. say what you want and ill be proud to admit it..

Dear Santa,
I know that this year i havent been the best kid on the block or maybe the smartest, but i know that deep down you have seen my do my share of the bad and the good. i tried i really really hard this year to keep my grades up and to take care of my mom and my own financial problems, i know that i have messed up a couple of times but everyone is human and who doesnt make obvious mistakes or hurt people that they love out of confusion and misunderstandings? even though i know i cant take back all the bad and wrong that i did just know that i would go to an endless extent to try to make all the wrongs i did right, im sorry i said hurtful things to the girl i love<3, im sorry i said hurtful things to my mom, im sorry i may have hurt the feelings of my best friends. i hope that you read this letter in time, because i do know that you have lots and lots of people around the world writing you letters and sending them to the North Pole. if not then Merry Christmas and Happy New Year
Sincerely,
Craig Sakuma








Craig<3Kim

ddiiiissssnnneeeeyyyylllaaannnddd

well yes i went to disneyland again for the first time in what a year or two,? cant really remember, anyway this day couldnt have gone any better, this i can say is honestly THE best time at disneyland, not to mention that one of the best days of my life, for some resaon we went the whole day and our legs didnt get tired till the end of the park, around 10ish and 11 o'clock when we decided to go back to her place and KNOCK OUTTT!!!, the only sad part was when i had realized they took away my favorite dish from this place i always eat at in New Orleans Square =[. but none the less that didnt drag me or her down any little bit.

so first off we decided to go on indiana jones, butttt for some reason the ride wasnt open yet or something had happened and we saw Kim's friend there and she gave us this cool looking fastpass for TWO people, yes for TWO!. anyway we just decided oh well lets just go on the jungle boat cruise, and we ha and asian skipper, the jokes were the normal ones and as usual pretty cheesy haha, when we got off we then made our way back to indiana, buttt it was still getting fixed or whatever, so then we fought the crowd and made our way to pirates, but then line was too long, so we just looked at haunted mansion since they are right next to each other we got in the wait line which was only TEN minutes, and we got to see Sandy, and Jack Skeleton from, The Nightmare Before Christmas!!! wow we are so lucky, so we rode that and it was the holiday themed one which was pretty sick, so then we were walking back and the line for pirates was only 15 minutes long, so we rode that and we got the very very very back of the boat, and as usual, that seat is the most wet so we had to sit like this "/" so our butts were on the edge but my the tail of my shirt still got wet (we had matching outfits by the way), so i rang it out and tried to keep as dry as possible...after that ride was over finally indiana jones opened...this day just has too many details to write down in a blog, or even say by word of mouth or picutes, you just had to be there to experience it. well this is the bottom line, no day in my life can top this..Thank You Kim for making this day so special, i love you always and forever <3


Craig♥Kim

change

change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.change.

time, oh how it flies...

i havent updated this bad boy in quite a while, so here it goes...well well the month is currently November, and if you think about it we only got Decemeber and the year 2009 is over...i can honestly say this is one of my worse yet best years of my life, i know i have said time and time again that i have found and lost people, but what really matters is who they are.

Either i have changed for the better or not, i am happy with who i am right now, sure i might have messed up in the past and now they are biting me in the ass for my mistakes that i have done, but the whole point is that its a mistake and there is nothing that can be fixed over time.

the thing that has impacted me the most is my family and friends, i have found out the truth about some very personal things that i have never known till present day and my whole outlook has changed, and every little piece of information is given to me it all becomes so clear on some actions that my mom has taken in the past.

As for friends, i dont know what has happened, to our group which was so close, now its as if we just are friends, instead of best homies, i remember how it was when we would be like family, now its like we dont even really exist to each other so to speak.

she keeps me sane♥

i have come to accept, all the things im going through is just a part of life, maybe some people will learn it the same way, maybe they will have it a lot easier, but the way i look at it and the way i live everyday gives me motivation to do better in school, i dont want my children to have to go through the things i am now, such as always counting down the days till i get paid, having to hear parents fight every afternoon, worrying about how parents will be taken care of in the future, not having the power to choose if their parents stay together or not, no child requests to be brought to this world, so if youre going to have one, dont put it though a horrible lifestyle....

ok this post was just a lot of random stuff that i needed to get off my chest, it might just sound like random rambling to some people but to others it might not, well i feel a lot better now that i have atlesat told somebody else rather than myself, its getting kinda late, so im going to flop on the bed and KO eventually till next time. good bye


Craig ♥ Kimberly

letting my armor down

as i sit here and think about you, i cant think of anything else in this world that i feel more connected to than you..i thank god everyday for letting me meet somebody like you, somebody who understands me, somebody who knows just what to say and just the way to say it, somebody who knows how to brighten up my day just by looking at me, and seeing that sparkle in your eyes is something that i will treasure forever...

i know i have made my share of mistakes, and its something that i will have to live with, and i cant take back, i know that they were silly and immature of me to jump to conclusions. but you and i this past night have revealed our pasts to each other, and that is something i will never forget, our families are somewhat alike in a weird way haha.

i just wanted to let you know that i am letting down my guard, and taking off my armor, i am ready to give you my all, i know you dont think i trust you, but i promise you, i am trying to the best of my ability to just think otherwise that you wont hurt me, or when you go out youll still come back to be in the end, i still remember that facebook message i got, that said, you were all about me, maybe i just need sometime to think about thinks before i actually accuse you or ask you what they are about, i promise you that i am trying my best to stop my silly behavior and make us last forever like how we planned <3

i love you Kimberly, and i know you love me too, lets make this last honey <3

loving life

Rockin = Cosmic Gate - Exploration of space

Mood = Never been happier

♥ status = in ♥

oh man, life has never been sweeter

genuinely happy

as i sit here at 3:07AM after doing some of my study guide, i think how proud i am to be the boyfriend of Kimberly Ip, its been a while, matter of fact years, that i have felt this way and this happy. by saying this way i mean, found somebody that actually makes me feel that they love me as much as i love them, in the past its always been, that the girl has not been as interested as me as i was into them, but this time it feels like we are equally in love <3. in the past a famous Doctor on the subject of marriage and family had said that "the person with the least interest has the most power" and if you think about it that is very true. but all that has changed now that i found Ms. Ip =] well its time for me to go to sleep now ill blog a little later, i can finally say, i will fall asleep smiling tonight <3.



Craig <3 Kim

one of the best

well well yes im sitting here right now blogging away =], finally right? well i just had to write about today, but it wont be much because today is just too fun to put into words=].

although my girlfriend is sick, we still had one of the most fun days ever, and im at home now just reflecting back on the day. and all i can do is smile. we spent most of the day sleeping and just laughing to ourselves about random things, and yes she kept tickling me, that kept her entertained for most of the day/night....well thats all for now, im off to eat some fruit snacks and have an orange...till next time laaaaaate




craig <3 Kim

sad

ever have one of those days you feel sad but you dont know why?....*sigh*

Universl Studios Halloween Horror Night

well well well, its been a hot minute i havent updated this mudda effa...here it goes...

well yesterday morning got a good 5 hours of sleep or so give or take a few hours, got up for work and then just cruised to work instead of being speed racer, and got there with maybe 15 minutes to spare, so i called Kim just to talk and say hello before i opened up the store..to be honest 11-4 was a blur, i cant really remember what i did or what happened i know i sold to one lady but other than that when it was just be in the store it was like -_- wow its already, lets just say 2o'clock. well about 3:50 rolled around and the homie paul came in, and we just chit chatted till it was 4 and i raced to Kim's house to pick her up for my anniversary gift to her which was me taking her to universal studios for their halloween celebration. well anyway as we head to hollyoowd, we hit some traffic but still make it there around 6ish, and we eat at buca di beppo, THE FOOD WAS SO GOOD "OM NOM NOM!!!" after that we already had our tickets PRESALES FTWWWWWWWW!, we got in i would say 20-25 mins not long at all, after we got in we went STRAIGHT for the terror tram, it was pretty crazy, i wonder how long they took to set up all those props just for this month, but they must have made a killing with the sales though...lemme get into detail about the tram, as you are sitting on the tram, the driver will start to introduce him/her self and start to tell you about the event, then the screen will start to go fuzzy and that weird looking doll thing from saw will come on and tell you that you are about to walk through a series of tests and you must survive as a group or you all DIE!, then as you get off, you actually get to walk the backlot, and get prettty close to the actual sets they used to film the classic movies such as Psycho, you get to walk up close to the bates motel, and also the house where he lives and you get to see the old grandma in the window in her little rocking chair talking shit, i couldnt really understand her. anyway as youre walking through the backlot this year, they had "my bloody valentine 3D" as a setting for this part and these guys with like axes and mining tools will come and swing at you, but after all that you run through some mini mazes, such as the texas chainsaw massacre, and halloween...after the tram ride, we went through the "my bloody valentine maze" it was alright, there was this one weird ass part where it was i guess supposed to be raining? and there was all this water coming down from the ceiling, yeah pretty nasty, after that we went into BY FAR, THE BEST MAZE I HAVE EVER BEEN THROUGH, it kicks the asylums ass like a rag doll, no joke! its the chucky maze, and mannn lemme tell you, the details and decorations for that was SO SICK, and also it was kinda scary, when you are in the queue for that line, you hear this guy talking MAD SHIT, like thats what your mom said last night, and rich bitches coming through, and as you make your way outside you are brought to a set of TVs and they are filming him and hes talking. As you keep walking you come to him actually chucky and someone is controlling him like a puppet, THEN you walk in and the fun part begins, i cant even explain it except this one part, there is this HUGE chucky costume and i thought it looked pretty scary, and this one part towards the end you gotta walk through and its a tunnel it spins man that was crazy hard haha. After the best maze of my life, we saw this one show, its called "the rocky horror show picture something something" that show was kinda weird, it was very sexual though o.O, then we were pretty tired. so i drove home and knocked out for a bit at Kim's then i got back to my place and JUST KNOCKED OUT...well that is my story for the best halloween celebration at a theme park and with the best girlfriend ever...till next time seeya laterrr gatorr


craig<3Kim

the dream at 4:20AM

its about 4:20AM when i am starting to write this blog, but i couldnt let this dream escape my mind without me writing down some remembrance of it, ive never had a dream this intense and this real to me.

the start of the dream was, it was a normal day in life, no work or school on this particular day, so i woke up around 9:00AM (dont ask), then all of my friends the sick six which we were called the summer of 08' they came barging in my room, all dressed in suits and looking real spiffy, they all say in unison but in their own voice "dude what are you doing get up you got to get ready for your wedding!" and suddenly i do remember its my wedding day. so im like ahhhh shit! thanks for waking me up guys outta the way i gotta take my shower (it was so vivid, i could feel the warmth of the water on my body and the smell of the soap as i applied it to my body)...after the shower i dry off in the matter of seconds considering that im in a rush. i put on a fresh pair of boxers and a fresh wife beater i run into my room only to find my tux already laid out on my bed freshly dry cleaned and the sick six eagerly waiting for me to get dressed so we could roll to the church...i tell them ok guys as soon as i put this on we will head to the church...so i throw it on as fast as i can and i go gel my hair making sure every spike is perfectly vertical and straight on. then as we arrive at the church suddenly Kim pops into my mind and how beautiful she must look...then out of nowhere Lawrence pulls up with his G ride and he has the song by Wiz Khalifa - Say Yeah, bumpin and im like wussup!? and he said this is for our group get us hyped up nah mean? and all of a sudden we all break out in a dance, im not sure who was doing what but i know i was doing a dance style known as "shuffling" and some were C-walking, some were gliding haha it was pretty epic but on with teh story. so after we were all done dancing my mom comes out and says are you ready moudy (my nick name) so i stand at the alter with my best homies at my side. and the here comes the bride melody starts to chime in and this whole time im thinking omg omg what if she has cold feet, what if she doesnt come? what if she had a change of heart? then as all relief comes to me i see a glimpse of my bride to be being walked down the aisle by her mother. she has a beautiful long white gown on and the veil over her face, but you can hear her faint sounds of tears as she lets go of her mothers hand she comes to meet me in the middle. all of sudden its like WARP SPEED, we go to the part where i need to put this HUGE DIAMOND ring on her finger so we exchange rings, and he says if you accept this woman to be your wife say i do, so we go through all the motions and when it was time to reveal the face of my bride, i put the veil back and i see the beautiful face of Kim, i can see she has tears in her eyes, and i could hear my mother sobbing in the background, as he says you may kiss the bride, i look into her eyes as if i were saying i love you silently and i close my eyes and kiss her, as we kiss the world seemed to be on hold, nothing mattered, no sound, no motion, no air, everything was set to "pause" as our lips departed from one another everything went back to normal time, but when we opened our eyes we were on our honey moon already... and our song is playing, the first song we had ever slow danced to which was KC and JoJo - All My Life, she comes close to me as i hold her by her waist, and she says "see babe, i told you i would never hurt you, we've been through so much together, i love you forever"...and we kissed and i woke up....

i guess what this dream is trying to tell me is that, when Kim said she wanted to be in a serious relationship with me, she really meant it, and that i finally found somebody who wont hurt me. well that is all i can remember from my dream for this night....until later good night


i love you kim <3

craig<3kim

ego

i have come to realize, that i have one of the biggest egos ever -__- haha, i mean its not a bad thing or a good thing but its just part of my personality... there are many things that influence this upon me. for one thing i will mention which is first i will mention that last. but running up in second place is my car, the 2000 pearl white honda prelude, i take a lot of pride in owning that car, it might not be the fastest or the sexiest, but i certainly make it fast and make it look as clean as i can. its also a lot more rare than a integra, or a civic, everyone and there mother had or has one. but the prelude depending on the area, like for example where i live, only a handful of people have one. then comes third, the guys i used to run with has got that mentality in me that everyone is human and we are all the same, so we should walk on the same level as everyone else. and my family is also a part of it, i got one of the most broken down, but more than likely the most powerful banded together of them all, we got each others back no matter what goes down. my current friends also influence this feeling, i know they got my back when i need it the most. but FIRST PLACE GOES TO THE GIRL OF MY DREAMS. Kimberly Elisabeth Sing Ip. she is the one that keeps me smiling all day long, and makes me think of brighter times if im having a gloomy day of my own. if im ever sad or not doing too well i know i can count on her to bring my mood up, even if im having a normal day, and i call her, when i hear her answer the phone i get a little smirk on my face...but how she influences my ego is every guy thinks they're girlfriend is beautiful but she surpasses all the others walking around out there. it sounds really bad but im not saying shes my trophy girlfriend, but in class we were talking about status, and feeling of your significant other, like "oh look who i have under my arm" and its true, in some places people will look at your mate and straight up judge. but i mean who wouldnt be confident if you have a pretty girlfriend, like who cares what he/she thinks about me, i know whats true and so does my mate. i have the best girlfriend ever no doubt, its not about her clothes, not about the money, not about the =X (haha), its about how she makes me feel, and the way she treats me, she will never know how much i love her, and what ill do or sacrifice for us<3. well i gotta go get ready to work and eat a little before. so ill probably continue more at work, till then seeya in a few hours blog...


craig<3Kim

realize my eomtions

for as long as i can remember ive been one of the more "chill people of the group'' that was up until the end of my senior year in highschool, i had the world going the way i wanted to, getting good grades, awesome friends, family was finally calming down, and what i thought was a faithful girl. i used to just sit back and relax when she would ask me if she could go and have fun, i thought meh a little fun what can it hurt? little did i know the answer was me. everything was going good till the study abroad program came up that following summer. so i thought oh cool what a great opportunity for her shes so lucky, so i bid her a farewell and off she went to china. i used to stay up till 3 talk for 15 mins and then wake up 6 for another 15 mins, she roomed with two guys who were pretty close, then she talked to me about going clubbing and having fun, oh sure go ahead, what could it hurt right?.....wrong.... she went clubbing, and in her words her friend "regulated" the guys...yyeeaahh rriigghhtt, then they all went to kareoke and they started to have some drinks, and some more and some more...thats when my first insecurity issues became big and noticeable after she cheated on me, but i was like she was fucked up, in more than one way, maybe i could put that behind me and keep it moving, well that worked for a while, till i got lied too, lied to my face...

and now i always have the thoughts of what if, but i need to open up my small little asian eyes and see i have a good and faithful girl who isnt going to hurt me, and that has a life, i just dont need to be in it or talking to her 24/7 365, everyone needs their

happy birthday law!

happy birthday big homie!, i dont think you will remember tonight HHAHAHAH

weddings =)

im sitting here next to my ladyyyy in a church, waiting for her friend james to get married, great guy, very nice, props to you homie =)

~youre the man today good luck to you and Naomi

craig<3kim

the silence of my eyes

just felt like posting on my day off, just relaxing at home with the a/c going feeling really nice in here, and for some reason, i came up with a quote, that probably someone already made up but i didnt really find anything on it so here it goes, the quote that popped in my head was "the most powerful words can be said through silence." i believe that it is so true, i stand behind that 110%, ill give you an example, lets say when you are with your gf, and you guys are under the starry night sky and just hugging and you look into her eyes, and you know that she is all yours and she loves you with the deepest of her heart, or it doesnt only have to be about love, it can also be about anger, or rage, if you were about to get down with someone and you guys size each other up and stare em down, you can tell in their eyes or in yours that they are there to win and mean business. i say this because i remember talking with my friends and they said their gf's always said "if you say i love you" too much too often it may loose its meaning", which i can see where they are coming from, i dont think i love you should be tossed around as an everyday thing with your significant other. i think that even if they dont say it, doesnt necessarily mean that they dont love you or love you any less, it should be already in your mind that they love you to one extent or the other. i know that if i look into the eyes of my T-Rex ^_^ that i will see all i need that will reassure me that she mine and only mine, and at the end of the night no matter how drastic or how dramatic it may be, she will always come back to me<3..


Craig<3Kim

another day =P

well well welllllll, yes yes just at work again chillin =) sold a couple of things, but today is going to be a good day i can tell =P, its already 2:26 and to be honest time flewwww for some reason, it feels like a minute ago i just barely opened up, but anyway i opened a bit early today cos i had a super duper bad stomach so i went in the store to use the restroom and after i was done i was like ehh, 20 mins aint going to kill me, so i opened up the store...everything was going good till i find the a/c isnt working so im like omg fml seriosuly?, then about half an hour into the first hour of the day, god saves me and i hear the rumble of the a/c get going, i was like "yes thank you lord!"...but yeah other than that today has been pretty normal =)


after work today is going to be good, im taking kim to go meet my grandma, the reason being is that my grandma being shes pretty high up there in age, she doesnt have that much more time left here with us, im pretty sure my dad said she has cancer, so i want her to meet kim since my grandma has already met david, which is my sister's boyfriend and most likely soon fiance, but anyway yeah so after work i need to zoom to kim's place pick her up and then i think go back home for a minute or two, then go to my grandma's house, im pretty sure we are eating there, but yeah good food though =)

i find that when i write in my blogs, it relieves me a lot from maybe the stress that is on my mind now, or maybe even weeks or days before, which is why i try to keep this thing updates as often as possible, i kinda thought at first oh this will just be like my xanga which i dont even remember the name for anymore it was so dang long ago, that thing i maybe went strong for about a month then iono what happened just stopped i guess, but yeah this is not like it, for some reason it intrigues me more and makes me want to jot down the toughts in my head

well this is all im going to post for this time, ill update tomorrow on how today goes =) seeya!


craig<3kim

another night

hello folks, just doing my daily update, err i try to but sometimes im slip up, im only human =P, anyway just chillin at work, till tonight there might be a little beer ponging going on, but who knows we'll see, this job isnt so bad =), id much rather be here than home, id probably be doing the same thing at home right now, so hey, why not make aome money along with it right? well anyway the weather has been extremely hot, business has been at a snails pace, and no new shipments of clothes =(...we gotta wait and see how things go i guess..

at times when im at home i feel like, she only puts up with me, because she needs my help, to get daily activities done, she was talking to me about my sister eaier in the week, and she just said, "yeah your sister moved out as soon as she could", and i can kinda see why now, i wouldnt mind talking to my mom, but she needs to think of some new subjects or things to say, always the same thing over and over, its like you said that already and its getting really annoying, i feel like its kinda unfair to me, i do want to move out as in present time like right now, i wouldnt mind moving out with a couple of friends or hell on my own, but im unable to cos of my mom, so in a way, im stuck, and i DONT want to live with her for the rest of my life, its like shes keeping tabs on me with whatever i do, im already 20 years old, she needs to start treating me like i am, i mean ill admit i have said some mean things, but i dont say them cos im a dick, i say them because it gets to the point where this is beggening to be too much for me to handle, i want to live life now while i still can and have fun, and yes i do that, but in the back of my mind i still have that thought about my mom... all she does is complain about her knee, i mean i get the point, it bugs you and it hurts and it must be hell not being able to walk normal or bend down, but she brings the pain upon herself, such as og ill mop the floor, or ill clean the sink, or ill sit down and wash the tub, then when i come home im already tired from work or from school, and all i hear about is oh my knee this oh my knee that, its so frusturating, sometimes i feel like telling her to shut the eff up about your damn knee, its not my fault you didnt go to college and had to work a manual labor job and we all know youre not the most physically fit person on this earth, the doctor told her to go on a diet and lose weight for her knee so there wont be so much pressure on it, but she just ignores his advice and eats whatever whenever...while we are on the topic of food, after work she always has me go get something, sometimes i just want to go straight home,

changing before MY eyes

i guess everyone can say that people will change through out the years, i say that is true, you can change for the better or just go completely south...ive known people who have gone down and just never have come back up, or just started on their left foot and just kept going. i guess for me ive changed for the better, after talking to my god brother, and how we talked about the past, i remember how i was down for anything, no matter what it would be, riding for them, running with the bad crowd, didnt matter who was around, how many there were at the time, how big they were, how small they were... also the temper i had, even if you looked at me wrong, i would explode and think hey wtf is this guy's problem? and the clothes i used to wear, i look back and think jeez how dumb did i look, walking around thinking i was the baddest $%#@$%@#%@^ that walked the earth... all the baggy jeans, the raiders jerseys, the Nike cortez i cant believe i wanted that kind of life style, its cool when you first get into it, but if you take a step back and look at the whole picture, you will basically go nowhere if you keep that kind of mentality, im glad that i met people who i started kick it with and slowly on my own get tired of it and change, not only for myself, but for my family and friends.

now at this point in my life, im helping out my mom, going to school, keeping a steady job (thanks paul), being a faithful boyfriend, trying to keep in touch with friends...i think ive changed for the better... just next time if im faced with a change, i know to think twice and look at the whole picture and not act on impulse.

craig<3Kim

happy 3 month anniverary

i would like to start off this post by saying happy 3 month anniversary to my perfect girlfriend Kimberly Ip =]....

ok well here we go, ill make this one short since im pretty tired and considering its about 3:46 AM, well back in the day, me and my friends had this thing about 3 months it was cursed that you will break up before or on 3 months, looks like we demolished that one <3....

Gnite

Craig<3Kim!

fight for what you love, even if it kills you

i love my family
i love my girlfriend
i love my homies
i love my life...

even if it kills me

last day of summer

well for me and most of my friends its our last day of summer, im opening the shop today so it aint too bad, but i must say this summer has been a real eye opener..saw old friends, met new people, tried new things, it has been pretty good id say...this summer was so different than last years, amazing how many things and how people can change in only a year.. i think that even though we had a lot more homie fun last summer, that this summer has been more 1 on 1 fun with just me and someone else, rather it be me and kim, me and law, or me and paul, everyone is basically doing their own thing this summer so its hard to find time when everyone is available, unlike last year, we were just all free all day everyday, i still remember when we would go to peter's house in the morning and he'd still be knocked out and we would wait for everyone to meet up and head out...oh man good times, and how we would burn out spots, such as the shoppes in chino hills, that was one of the best summers of my life, just giys night out everday of the summer haha...but this summer was really fun, i loosened up a lot this summer and im not so stressed this time around, a lot more carefree...above all i was very productive this summer, i didnt just sit around and do jack squat, but thanks to one of my best friends paul, i have a job and im making some money, to mainly spend on whateevers such as school, books, and the gf

hmmm

ummm ok

done for a year

yesssss sweeeeet im done for another whole year atleast for the dreaded jury duty, i mean it wasnt all that bad since my case got cancelled, so all in all i woke up at 6AM took a shower and washed up, then i got dressed, ate, and then i left my house at 7:15 got there around 7:30 and got to the jury assembly room around 7:45...well around 8 oclock orientation started, and blah blah blah, instructions, then she said our judge was busy, so they played a tape about jury duty, such as what goes on and guidlines so to speak. after the movie had ended she said ok at 12 to about 1:30 you all have lunch...so we waited i kid you not 3 and a half hours in the damn assembly room (which i slept most of by the way) and then she said, ok everyone your case has gotten resovled and or cancelled, thank you for showing up to your civil duty obligation please take your certficate certifying that you have served on the way out thank you...so basically it was kinda a waste of time not really but atleasr i didnt need to go through the motions and this and that...

so after that i got home and ate, since all i had were noodles before i left, my mom got me mcdonalds, then i knocked out since i was still sleepy, woke up and took a shower, thennnn i knew i had to work at 8 to 10, but then i got a text from my co-worker saying she couldnt stay till 8, she had some family thing she had to go to, so i arrived at the store around 7:25-7:30 and just started my shift from there, it didnt seem like 2 hours since, a dad and his 2 girls came in and their dad was just small talking with me and this and that and i closed the doors at 9:45 and closed up shop, i got home around 10:17 and im pretty hungry and my french bread pizza will be ready in about 8 mins...

and maybe i get to see the most perfect girl in the world later tonight, we'll see =)

-toodles

craig<3kim

thoughts

well its about 12:31AM right now and i felt like posting since im trying to update as frequently as possible, might as well make use of this sucker. yes i had work today, closing as usual, but tomorrow im supposed to close as well. and im scheduled another saturday which i guess is fair?, but we'll see about next week, if i keep getting scheduled saturdays i dont know what im going to do, i really miss my dad, and if he cant understand that i just want to chill with my dad on saturdays then if worse comes to worse im going to have to get fired or quit... my family means a lot to me, and people might not understand what its like. the last time i saw my dad, was almost in a 2 month gap where we could just chill, and that wasnt even just father and son that was the hold family, yeah i love my family, but i havent had time to just be me and him in over 3 months believe it or not, and why you may ask? because some people just dont want to work on weekends? yes that is right, i mean shit if your parents open up a shop, you should be pulling more work or just as much as any of the other workers, and you should know how to open and close the damn store, is it people dont want to learn? or were just never taught? and some faggots (literally) say that oh i have school EVERY saturday, we all know that was a crock of shit, but its cool stuff will be changing all around now since school is amongst us in merely even a week.

well well, suprise i got jury duty tomorrow FUCK MY LIFE haha. atleast ill make 15 bucks -__-


-toodles

craig<3kim

piece of mind

well i am here on my good ol trusty pc i forgot how much i actually miss this veteran of a PC, its helped me with so many things, homework, friends, cheating gfs, you know the normal stuff haha. anyway im not sleepy at all and its already 12:02AM, well no jury duty for me tomorrow err today actually so thats a good thing, i just checked my financial aid and something has gone wrong with the acceptance of it, and i know that i can pay it off on my own, but then im just afraid something might come up right at that moment when i need to pay it off and my mom will need to borrow money again, well life is life right? got to make the best of what we have and are given.

there are times that i sit at my computer and i wonder that if my family is going to turn out like my mom's. just today i was very very VERY annoyed with her, i mean she said "well your sister moved out as fast as she could" and now i see the reason why, sometimes living with her is unbearable, i dont know how much longer i can take it here, there are times i REALLY want to move out, such as today, but then i think "ok if im gone, whos going to take care of her?", so i might be complaining and might be selfish for thinking that, but i mean i need a life too, i cant just keep working, and taking care of her, thats all ive basically been doing for the past few months, is i go to work, or im stuck at home doing chores, take today for example, she made me take down allll the boxes in the outside storage, and put them alll back up for what you may ask? for a freaking cord to the damn dvd player she has and that SHE PACKED...did we find it...NO!

also her obsession with computers sickens me, shes so compueter illiterate its like a joke, shes like oh my computer never had paint...and i know FOR A FACT, that every Windows XP has paint, and shes like nooo i never used it, and i was like "just cos you never used it, doesnt mean you never had it" and she just mumbles on about how she wants to crop a picture and she doesnt know how to do it. its like well instead of complaining why dont you just go look on google, jeez, thats what search engines are for. to look and find answers...but its ok, you got to learn somewhere right? you dont learn things on your own you learn from experience and or instruction.

well ok this vent has gone on long enough, i am now calm cool and collected *Ahem* till next time kiddos payce!


Craig<3Kim

daily

well good morning fellow bloggers, im just chillin on my bed watching a knights tale, one of the best movies ever...today i gotta run around a lot ughh, first off, i gotta get ready and go to a aheim for a greoup meeting at goodies, then i gotta race back here and try to make it in time to pick up the cake at 99 ranch market for my sisters boyfriends birthday, then i gotta find the cord for the dvd player i think, and go to blockbuster to find a dvd that everyone will enjoy...but before that me and kim must go to pick up some cotscoooo pizza hehe, 2 large supreme pizzas =) that is the bombest pizza out there... so all in all it should be a fun day..

then after that i got invited to elaine's birthday party and so did kim, so that should be interesting, sounds like a fun night to me =)...well imma go out and see if i need to do any chores and make this one short. toodles


craig<3kim

at work

well hello everyone once again i am at work for lets see the 6th day in a row? but hey im making pretty good money ^_^, gotta help out the fambam nah mean? well this week has been pretty good, although its only thursday this week has pretty much come to an end...since Kim was back home for most of this week i didnt mind working at all, why not right, dont really have anything else to do with my time, id probably just be sitting at home wasting the day away in front of the TV..

did everyone hear about the stupid best buy tv crap? i know i know its old news but it still would have been epic if they honored theyre advertised, damn the "fine print" at the bottom of the paper ughh, oh well back to where i started haha

also something thats old news, the meteor shower, i walked outside i looked up at the sky and was like o.O i dont see squat except for that so cal smog and pollution, oh well always next year,

this weekend we are celebrating my sisters boyfriends birthday im pretty sure hes turning 24, but anyway, its really hectic because saturday was chosen by my mom and like every other saturday i had to work obviosuly because no one really works that day except for 2 out of the 5 workers and im always one of the 2 =D joy...-_- anyway, i got the day off but nowwww there is a meeting, and i dont have a problem with the meeting, but my mom is trippin out and is saying "if they know you have plans that day why dont they make it the next week if you MUST be there" but anyway it is what it is, and thank you Kim for helping my mom out this up coming week i dont know what id do without you hun...

but yeah not much to write, just sitting here chillin since only one person has bought something so far, well ill break this one short, till next time toodles..

craig<3kim

as i sit and stare

as i sit here and stare to the outside world, i always wonder what is in store for me today, is it good or bad? will it make me angry or sad? will it fill me with joy and happiness? i know that i can be happy and i for a fact know that i can also be sad, there are a lot of things in this world that when i think about them make me uneasy or edgy so to speak, like take my family for example, whatever happened to the whole family is forever motto that people raved about was being so important to remember...family isnt always forever, they are just people and they do come and go as they please just like everyone else in this world. in reality i think some people are blessed and lucky to have their family still together and live with their siblings, as for me, we got our familt divided directly down the middle, we started out with four, and now we only have two, my mom and dad split up, and my sister lives with here boyfriend now and rarely comes to visit, and that just leaves me and my mom, i mean yeah i feel good that i live with my mom and help her out when she needs to go places, but i also want to live a personal life too, its just that i cant remember when i had time just to be at home and relax, im always on the go whether it be work, school, or taking care of my mom...i know i shouldnt be complaining about this type of thing, some people dont even have a mom or dad, which is why when i feel myself start to get angry i think you know what if they werent here tomorrow, oe today, or now, ill be super sorry that i was so mean to them, and also i know that if she knew how or could do it on her own she would, but hey what can i say sometimes it gets frusturating...

there are times when i just dont know what to do or what to feel about my future, scared, anxious, in love, adventerous, all of those mixed into one, and i love it, i know that things may look a bit cramped right now, but somehow sooner or later i always get through things no matter how bad they look, i got all the support i need, i got the most perfecr girl behind me, my homies got my back, and my mom is with me every step of the way,

as i sit here at work for the 4th day straight i reflect on this morning, when i woke up at 9:50 i remember thinking jeezus my body really is getting tired and it feels like i have no more energy, im one of the newest workers yet i work just as much as a guy who started out almost when the store first opened up to the public, with that being said i work 4 days a week, but when school kicks up i gotta say 3 is the max, i already made a

sit and think

as I sit here wit the sun shining in my face, and the time I have here to be alone, my friends give me an instant message on aim, seems like the only thing going on these days is heart break, do they not know how it feels to have their hearts broken someone that they really did like? with that being said, it makes me wonder about the background that they have come out of or the way that the parents have taught them to care for others and the type of people they hang arouund with, just because someone is taller, or cuter, or maybe has a way with words, doesn't mean that he or she will necessarily love you more or treat you better than your current significant other, yeah I mean at the beggining it seems like a dream or a fairytale you never want to end or never want to want to wake up that its so good, but just wait till a problem arises and you guys end up in a fight or disagreement, one of the most important things in a realtionship is communication and the willingness of both people to work it out and compromise. the one that also ties for first in my book is trust, I mean everyone is entitled to get jelous or uneasy with people your boyfriend ot girlfriend hang around with I mean its natural, but you need to think, ok they haven't done anything to break the trust that I have for them but I know that it is a lot easier said than done. I mean I'm speaking from expirience on the whole communication and trust part, I've learned it the hard way from the past. if anyone, no matter who it is whether it be your mom, or megan fox, or shoot even orlando bloom for you ladies, if they try to change you, then why be with them? it just means that they are not with you for who you really are deep down inside, believe me I've changed but now I'm the real me the real mccoy the real deal, the real craig steven sakuma, somewhere along the way somebody made me forget who I really was, and what was important in my life, which is friends and family. I know I may have seemed like I went on and on about bad trust issues or bad communication, I know that this will never happen to me again, she has changed me back to who I really am, she has brought me up to this point and I don't see any signs of stopping, she means everything to me, and I love her!


craig <3 kim

coming to an end.

as summer comes to an end, i must say, this summer didnt even feel like summer at all. i dont know what it was, maybe it was my job, maybe it was our group, maybe it was my family, maybe it was everything, it just feels like it was barely a month that i had summer, but none the less, i still say that last summer, that was the craziest and most fun of all, no worries what so ever, out every day every night, every night was basically a guys night out too epic... but this summer was fun in its own ways, i found new friends, new love, and found out that no matter what happens friends can pull through anything.

we have roughly around 2 more weeks before school begins...bring it on

dear kim

you are the bestest, most nice, most prettiest, most PERFECT gf in the whole wide world!<3

life.

it's really funny how things just fall into place...

i know in my past i was a bad person im not going to lie, use to run with some pretty bad people and did some pretty bad and ruthless things that i probably wont be able to forgive myself for even if i prayed every single night of my life. im done with that whole scene, im just over it and ive been over it, picking fights, thinking im the hardest thing that walks this planet, wearing clothes that probably will take 3 of me to fit...i take a look back at what ive done in the past and i think what was i thinking and why did i do it? for pride? for respect? for fear? for bragging rights? till this day i still dont know what i was thinking...

i know its my responsibility to take care of my mom, but at times i cant help but to explode, i know im already 20 years old and i should be mature enough not to but then again i might not be THAT young but im still in my prime, and i want to go out just to have fun with my best friends or just chill with the girl i love the most right now, when i explode and just storm off, i forget to sit down and think...damn..how would i feel if i cant do all the things that i do now, cant walk around the block, cant go to places without worrying about pain... so now ive realized that and im working on keeping my temper down..

i dont know what i did during these past few years for this angel to come into my life. before her i was just used as a filler to certain someone, yeah shes ok as a friend but sometimes i think back to my past with her and ask myself, why did i want to stay with her so badly? she just used me when i was needed, it such a staggering blow to my head because this girl now treats me SO RIGHT and i know what it is like to truly be loved by somebody. she makes me feel im actually wanted and worthy of her time. and i know deep down she will never do anything to hurt me, i love her so much, id do anything for her...You know who you are baby..

as for my dad, i dont know about him, i know he loves me and my sister very much, but the more my mom reveals to me the more i think and see it that a girl can change anything they want to about a man. he makes a pretty decent amount of money, but yet he always says hes "tapped out" i dont know if its the truth or he had gone drinking the night before? or maybe he had a date a few nights ago. i wish that i knew the truth what really went on between my parents to make them split up, i know that my mom and dad fought quite often, but i mean thats something so little, if you really love the person you guys can work through anything.

i got the best friends in the whole world. no matter what happens i know that they will be there for me, no matter how "shady" i may seem to be...all we need to do is work it out and maybe talk about the subject and seriously talk and not mess around or beat around the bush and i know we will meet eye to eye when its all said and done. without them times would be pretty rough and i know that i need them in my life.

my sister...through the years shes taken care of me, when i was younger she was so nice to me, she would make me food, teach me how to spell, work on my reading skills, and just be the best sister in the world. but now, after she attended UCR and she had graduated when we arrived home, she seemed like she had changed, she wasnt the same sister i knew for so many years, she would throw out rude comments about me, or my possessions, or how i dressed that day, i mean i didnt mind what she thought because im just not that type of guy, but some comments are just unneeded or we can do without them. just the other day she had offered me a bed that i couldnt refuse, and they even steamed cleaned it for me and all the works. then my mom starts complaining about something i can hear her from beyond the door, so i go out there and ask her whats wrong, and she says does it seem to you that lauren is acting like a little bitc* these days? and i just say iono and walk back to my room...but it is starting to occur to me now also...

but with all that being said, lets break it down.
-i know my mom loves me to death
-i know my dad will be there if i neeeded him
-i know my sister got my back with anything
-i know my girlfriend loves me with all her heart and soul
-i know my friends will be down for me anytime i need it
-i know ive changed my way of living
-i know im a better person now

I LOVE MY LIFE!, thank you for everyone that is in it, you guys make my life awesome..


-special shout out to my baby boo <3 i love you honey
p.s get well soon!

Kim Ip<3

no matter what condition we go through i know that we will be together in the end, we have gone through so much already and it has only barely been 2 months haha, wow seems like so much longer, i know that we have gotten through one of the hardest parts in our relationship already and we stuck with each other, with that being said i know we can get through anything that is thrown our way...

i promise i will never be too busy for you, or say whatever subject it may be is more important...
you are the girl of my dreams and so much more....

i know you arent feeling well right now and i feel absolutely horrible for not being able to be there and make sure you're ok or even better, to make you feel back to normal, you know in a heartbeat id switch places with you so you never have to feel sick or anything bad ever again....


Ill be hoping and praying for you everyday that you feel better mucho quick =]

I Love You

~Craig Loves Kim

hmm

many times i sit back and wonder, is this what i really want?, whats wrong with my mind now days...i never used to be like this..

too soon...

wtf, im only 20 years old, i shouldn't be responsible for our family financial problems and having to pick up the slack...

best of the best

i have the best girlfriend in the whole wide world,


yes...be jealous

being next to her <3

means everything to me!

im sorry,

im sorry, never ever again honey, i promise...

feels like summa!

ahhh yes FINALLY what we have longed for, the feeling of summer time!, yesterday was the first day it has actually felt like summer. well i kicked off my day with waking up around 9ish and going to work, sold a couple of items here and there, then i raced back home and went to the market with my mom before going to kieblers house for a kickback we threw for Paul's going away to the Dominican Republic for about eight days, just like last year except last time he went for 10, which was funny because although it feels short, i remember we would always be chillin and be like oh hey whats Paul or up to, or hey lets call up Paul, and then we would be like =[ oh yeah i forgot hes still on his trip, but none the less, we will all be eager for him to come back!..then after we all settled down at kieblers and cleaned up, we all made our way to Peter's house where we played a couple games of beer pong, me and lawrence were on a roll till we played against peter, and kiebler =\ but its all good =] we still had a blast..

as for today, i think i will just stay home and chill with my mom, i know i have to go to target, and albertsons with her just to pick up some food to eat for later, but other than that, just chill and enjoy one of my days off..

If there was one thing that would complete my summer day right now, it would be to be with my Kim =]...ill see you soon babe, i miss yah muchozzz!!!!


-K+C

one of the most nervous nights of my life..

haha well yes yes Kim invited me down to el segundo her home town where the population was a little over 16,000 people hmm kinda a small town id say. as for the drive it was pretty epic i was cruising around 80-90 all the way down there except for the occasional accident, one for each freeway so all and all that equaled out to three accidents and bumper to bumper traffic, im surprised my leg didnt fall off haha jkjk, but as i got closer and closer to the beach i put my windows down and man the breeze felt like heaven to get away from the 909 heat. but i eventually made it to her house in i think little over an hour? and i met her sister at first and then her mom came home and she took us all out to eat at Kim's favorite Korean BBQ place in K-Town. the food was SO GOOD! and her mom fed me like a little piggy haha! but none the less she has a great and funny family, i hope everything went as well as i thought they did, and as for now im going to eat breakfast...JAPANESE FOOD w00t w00t! until next time...PAYCE


-K+C

hello hello

well yes here i am in my room roasting away haha, its pretty dang hot and my fever that i had just gotten over didnt make it any easier either, but anyway yes i am updating cos a certain someone said i didnt update as much as i should take a guess haha her name starts with a "K" and ends with a "M" or a "Y" either or haha, well anyway today is a pretty nice day outside i guess, i was supposed to go to the beach with the homies but i coulndt due to my sickness, oh well atlast maybe ill get to see the gf later, thatll brighten up my day =], and let me tell you guys something, SHE IS ONE MAJOR STALKERRRRR haha....jkjk shes just a creeper sometimes, well i didnt do much today, its still pretty early only breaking around 5:00PM well today i just went to target with my mom to just grab some stuff, then i went to albertsons cos target amazingly didnt have the cheaper price, gotta watch it man they're slippin >.< but its all good target ftw, well anyway after that just came home and had some jack in the box and now im here blogging, and thats all that has happened SO FAR for today, so until next time,,,LATE



-K+C

a taste of things to come

being with her...

being with the homies...

gas tanks on "E"...

endless nights...

priceless moments...

midnight food runs...

unbearable heat...

funny how we long for summer to come around, but yet when it does, we still have noting to do haha...this is just a taste of things to come...

June 25th, 2009 ♥

HAPPY ONE MONTH ANNIVERSARY BABE!!!♥

summer of 09'

HERE WE COME BITCH!!!! yeee you better ready for us!

this summer is going to be one of the most epic summers i can already tell!!!

i got my close homies, i got my bestfriend by my side ♥, i got my family!!! shit im set!!!


LET THE GOOD TIMES ROLL!!!


-K+C

thats how the cookie crumbles

now i know who is real and who is fake...ive found my true friends who are down for me no matter what, and some others who are just all show just to prove something...

ive found someone who cares about me and also who gets approved by my family, which has never happened before, so im pretty happy about all that..

Work has been going really well, finally got the hang of everything and im really happy with that.

School has been pretty chill, ive been staying on schedule for finals and been staying on top of my work...

shit im loving life right now ♥!


LIFE IS FINALLY GOING MY WAY...

ive got so much love to give

"ive got so much love to give....ive got so much love to give...ive got so much love to give.."

freeloaders - so much love to give

Time Flies

wow as i was just sitting here vegetating, i was actually looking at my calendar, did you realize that next month is June, i cant believe that next month the year of 2009 is almost already have over...goddamn...

so we are all settled in.

well..well.. its been a while since i have updated ths thing majig, anyway the apartment is pretty nice, its looking more and more like home everyday we go through a box, and as for my room, its looking better and better as the days go by. i recently bought a black dresser to go along with my black and gray theme of my room, and let me tell you, that thing was one of the hardest pieces of furniture to build, well let me rephrase that, it was hard to build it was just really long, and a lot of steps to go through, im so surprised that the neighbors didnt complain, i was still hammering in the nails in the back around 2:30AM and then i finally had the opportunity to take a shower and knock out. finally have a chance with you know who again, i hope this time it works out better than the last 2 times we were together...

meeting new people and going on some more cruises, growing closer to people, breaking people down to see their true colors, and perhaps maybe finding out my own as well, this summer is going to be a real eye opener lets see if we can all chill like how we did last summer, we all were talking about "topping" last summer, but that is sure going to be hard. well im going to eat a vons pastry ill update later till later guys...late!


-predude!

thank you

thank you to all the homies who wished me a happy birthday!!!, well happy birthday paul, and happy birthday to myself.


P.S. in 30 mins happy birthday to the homie kiebler!! ill seeya later


-predude!

20....

good bye 19 and hello 20.....

the day has come

well well well, i havent updated this thing in a hella long time. well i have a legit reason why, I FINALLY MOVED INTO THE APARTMENT!!!, my room is about the same size as it was at the house just a bit smaller. and also i have an A/C unit in my room and ALSO i can see my car from my window which is just AWESOME! and i got this new table for my birthday which is HUGE so i set up my computer and everything on it, looks like a freaking mini computer arcade haha, yepp so as of right now just got back from riverside, it was so funny! haha OMGPOP ftw! but damn that freaking freeway is ATROCIOUS i hate driving that thing its just a straight line like "|" so on the way there and back i was kinda sorta falling asleep blah...but yeah i better get a move on and start hanging up some clothes and getting ready to sleep. so till next time...PAYCE...


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so lately.

so lately its been pretty chill, growing closer to new people getting away from the druggie crowd is how i need to live now, right now is the most vital time in our lives, we are going to college, this is our future of how we will live our lives, and support our families, it hit me that i am almost 20 years old now, i cant mess around, and so far its been going pretty well not slacking off just a bit on reading but thats ok i caught up.... no time to screw up now i gotta keep it in gear....till next time


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At a boring office makes me sit and wonder

I sit here and I wonder why my life is the way it is haha. Not that I have a bad life or anything but makes me wonder about some people I hope everyoene knows what welfare is, it's for people who need help with financial problems but yet you still ask to borrow money what is that all about? And you turn your back on the homies and then when you can't reach out to the crowd you left for you expect us to be there waiting no way we are like life, and life doesn't wait or stop for anyone. I might sound cold right now but I mean you go MIA for that amount of time anyone will drift away it just don't feel the same anymore..the sick six is no more...

pray for her

please everyone my grandma only has a short amount of time to live....makes me sit back and realize how short life is and why do so many people want to fight or go to war just to decrease the short amount of time we have to live?.....just please pray for my grandma ♥....i love you grandma!




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ten rens

im at ten rens at this moment with lawrence, just chillin and doing some homework i honestly thought i would get no work done here, but to my surprise i did 3 essays for one class and one assingment due for another class at the end of this week, man i am set i hope we do this more often this is pretty legit, haha some people are here that i dont really like, but fuck it, thats some old school homo shit, im over it now, well back to work PAYCEEEEE

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hmm

yo fellas, wusssup, i havent updated this bish for a while, but whateverssss that just means ive been hella busy, which is pretty much true, been running around to different parts of town and looking at all the apartments, after looking at about a handful of them my mom finally decided and we have chosen the hills of diamond bar, which is right on grand...anyway we submitted the application today to see if they will approve of us staying there, and if they do, we have about a good 2 weeks to move all our stuff in and get settled, it looks nice there the apartment is very spacious considering its an apartment. my room looks right over the car port which is nice becuase i can keep an eye on my car, the carpet is new, the walls and ceiling were just re-painted and it looks pretty damn nice, finally i get a full size bed, and a bigger table for my computer. i just hope everything goes according to plan. well i have to leave for school in about an hour so im just going to chill till then....till next time kiddies...payce out!


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fuck mt sac parking...

i think i used more gas in the parking lot, than i did actually driving to mt sac....35 mins in the darn parking lot, and STILL i ended up having to go across the street and parking at super arcade....what does it take to get a FREAKING parking space....

chillin with my mom

i am here in the living room chillin with my mom, watching tv we are watching "The most shocking videos caught on film" its pretty chill, we did a lot of work today, we looked up new potential apartments, and looked up the reviews, you wouldnt believe some stuff that we found out about them, some actually rented the apartments to actual registered sex offenders, you wouldnt believe how many there are around this area... anyway on a happier note, i payed 23 bucks for my mt sac classes and i get my check soon, depending on how much it is, i can get my coil overs finally, and possibly get my authentic Wing West wing painted and hooked up and my car will be looking real sick status ^_^, i never knew it would be so cool just sitting here watching tv with my mom its pretty fun looking at all the stupid stuff people do and get caught on camera...wow...another drop in the stock market and making he economy go more homo.. yeah pretty random but anyway, its funny to see how people can change in just a day or so, one day they can make you the apple of their eye and the next just a rotten core so to speak (i love my analogies that i think  of off the top of my head)... i went to mt sac today, and met up with paul and peter and we just looked for my classes which i have tomorrow wednesday and thursday blah, then we went to tea rush and saw a fight in the parking lot, this one little white kid was talking REAL trash, and then this black kid just decked him and you see him go down, that hit was REAL clean and on the button, later we got news that the white kid's nose was bleeding.... but there is not much else to say about today so until next time people..payce

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Let The Games Begin!

SCHOOL HAS OFFICIALLY STARTED!

blah here i go

well, here i am sitting here watching america's next to model with my mom haha, we are also looking at apartment ratings and man thank god that we looked into those things because the reviews for the crest are pretty bad, i mean i wouldnt mind living there but i think my mom would be unsatisfied because of the things she thinks of. but i am worried about my car if we do end up living at the crest, because some people said that their cars have been keyed and or the badge has been stripped off, also there is bad parking and they love to tow your car and you must pay up to 200 bucks just to get you car back. the only places that have great ratings are the luxury apartments, but we dont have the funds to pay for that it would be nice to live in one of those but dang i guess we gotta make due with whatever we have available to us and just make the best choices we can and conserve what money we have by living where we can enjoy life. today was a pretty epic fail though, at first we had to go pathfinder park and then realized everyone went to rosa somethings park near someones house, they were all playing bball there but i wasnt in the mood or was i dressed to play, and i hadnt eaten anything so me and law just went to puente hills mall where i got a bigmac meal from mcdonalds and he got teriyaki palace and we just ate and chilled for a while then we went home because we really had nothing else to do. well tomorrow for most people is school but i dont have class till tuesday which is chill because then i get a 4 day weekend since i have no class on friday either which is really nice =] i cant mess up this quarter...so here i go and ill get at you guys later..till next time...PAYCE

memories...

damn, it has just hit me that, i will be leaving this house and will never be coming back, i sit here and remember it was not so long ago when i moved into this house thinking ok im settled in, now lets make the best of this....i also sit here and i look to my right which is my window, so many memories of seeing the special faces of people outside and how eager i was for them to come in...as i walk around the house it has hit me that jeez, im really going to miss this house...and this room, so many memories in this house that i will leave behind, but i know i will make many more at my new residence, this is my visual way of saying goodbye to the memories "we, us, together" have made here, goodbye...



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epic fail X2...

ahhh shit goddamn epic fail #2 of the year 2009 DAYMIT!

epic fail..

well...today was...no joke an EPICCCC FAILLLL.....

sighhhh

here i am again, up at 3:40AM with my bad eating habits, i just had about 8 frozen taquitos and a cup of coke, for some reason its just been really hard to sleep these past few weeks, ever since i got the new of us moving. which is odd im actually happy i get to move again kinda, i know my room wont be as big or i wont be living in a house anymore, but hey i still get a roof over my head, so who am i to complain, i get to live there for free. this year seems like everything is falling into place, maybe its finally god's way of saying hey here is a little slack in life, although i may not deserve it i might just get it, kinda like everything in my life. i know now, that i have witnessed true friendship and galancy in that one special girl ♥. if you read this, i just want you to know, ill do anything in my power to help you, you'll never be alone girl...well im half asleep and my glasses are burning my eyes. so im off to bed....till next time people...good night and sweet dreams..


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confused again..pt 2

well here i am sitting here once again feeling more confused than ever....its about 2:13 PM and in about 45 mins i need to leave for my sister's bday dinner, but back on topic..i just dont know, is it my style?, is it my point of view, is it my approach?, or maybe i have just come to face the fact that its just ME. i have learned before you should never change yourself for someone, no matter how badly you want it, and yes you may get that person, but deep down inside is that really you?, is that person seing the real mcoy? ive learned from the past, that if you change yourself, you still may not even get that person, i guess what im trying to say is, im just going to keep being me the real Craig Sakuma, and im not having a second thought about changing, im going to keep my life tRue...

I thought i knew what was going to happen in the near future but this just proves that in one night, in one hour, in one second the whole world can change, and you can meet that person that gives you butterflies each and everytime you think about them. till next time...


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confused again...

Where do we stand?, do you feel the way i wish you do?, its been a while since ive felt like this over someone who i just barely met, from the moment we first met to the first time we said "hi", i looked at you and just thought "nah, she would never even give me the time of day to talk or even to just hang out", but man was i wrong the first time we actually hung out we spent countless hours just talking about random stuff that came across our mind and drawing random things such as our pet shark ken haha! its hard to believe i can feel what i feel for you after just getting to know you for such a short period of time, after my last heart break i thought man im done with girls for a while, but you changed my whole perspective on that really quick. usually i talk really easily to everyone whether it be on the phone, or in person, with you its different when you call my heart races, my mind turns into a panic state and i think ok dont mess it up Craig, and all of a sudden ive lost my words and i dont know what to say in fear that i might say something that will mess everything up. although people may say stuff, i figure ill let them talk, they dont feel the way i do when i see you, you already know i really like you, i just hope that you feel the same way, and not let anyone or anything change that... i may be jumping from subject to subject and topic to topic, but probably because its about 3:49AM and im getting pretty sleepy, ill continue this tomorrow...good night and sweet dreams...


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valentines..

its been a while, well now that i think about it, this is the first time a girl has actually ASKED ME to be her valentine first, haha. to the girl who holds my heart, you have no idea how nervous about today i was, i could barely even sleep, and when i actually did lay in bed, i kept thinking of the "plan" that i never got to do haha! i was so nervous that i had every angle covered, i even had a plan C starting from plan A, i hope you liked your gifts that i made you, a thing i like to say is handmade is ALWAYS better than buying it in a store, even if it may look the same, there will always be that microscopic differenec that makes it specially made JUST FOR YOU!, well this day is specially for you m'love, HAPPY VALENTINES DAY, and thank you for making the year of 2009 so special for me already, you have no idea how grateful i am that i have met such an amazing person as you! good night and sweet dreams ♥ ♥ ♥...



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p.s. HAPPY VALENTINES DAY EVERYONE!

what a tiring day

hmmm today, i didnt really do much, i just helped my mom pack the living room nick nacks, and then i brought into a box into my room and i started packing my boom box, and a lot of other things like CDs, and DVDs in my room....well it says that its going to rain on friday...just great....well its alright nothing will be able to stop me, not a wall of fire. i just hope that everything goes according to plan, well its almost 12AM right now and my mom was saying something about an early start, and i know i should sleep but how odd it is for me to sleep this early...usually i sleep around 2 or 3 AM but i know that its just for my own good tomorrow if i want to do some MAJOR packing which i will do tomorrow =]...my room is almost done, but man my moms room and the garage will take a team of 10 just to get it done...*Sigh* im actually kinda happy that i get to move. new home, new room, new furniture, NEW START! lets make this start a good one and with the people that really matter and make the year of 2009 what i want it to be, well im going to go wash up and knock out yall, so till next time kiddies...PAYCE!!....

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hope

hope is all i can run on for this one..lets hope this year isnt like last year..hope for me fellas....till tomorrow...payce


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wow today =]

i dont think today is going to get anymore exciting than it already has been haha, well lets see where shall i start?....i woke up at 7:15, and i was like ahh feels good to wake up early, and next thing i know in a blink of an eye its freaking 8:00. so i SHOOT out of bed and jump in the shower and i get out get my ass dressed and then off to rowland!, i come back wash the gel out of my hair, and i knock back out till around...1ish? then i get out of bed and wash up once again and i hear this very rapid ticking noise on the ground, and my mom yells from the living room, "craig its hailing!" and im like ohh thats nice....wait...hail!...MY CAR AHHH SHIT!, i didnt put it back in the garage after i came home this morning, so i shoot out of my room with just a hoodie and pj pants on, slip on my shoes and challenge the falling ice as i proceed to my car i ALMOST slip and eat shit, but luckily i didnt HA!, well anyway i put my car back inside and i just chill in my room, then as the rain lets up my mom took me to the uhaul store where we bought more boxs for our move coming up at the the end of March i believe, after that we went to the market and bought a grip of food since my mom said its going to be raining for a couple more days we just thought we'd stock up and hibernate all through this vicious storm we are having. well i dont think tonight is going to get anymore exciting...so till next time people...payce


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when?

when will enough be enough for one person to handle? you can push a person to the limit and never even know it.... one thing i have come to realize through heart break is you can try to be selfish and keep that person so you can be happy, but if you say you love that person or care for that person as much as you said you did before, wouldnt you want them to be happy and worry free?... ask yourself that question, if you keep pulling them back down with you, did you or do you really care of that person if you keep hurting them in that sense? take a step back and look at the whole picture before you assume that you can change someones feelings and how they look at you just by pulling them back. if you would rather live a lie and say face to the truth, then i have nothing furthermore to say...till next time...


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paradise

i can already tell the year of 2009 is going to be one of the most epic years i will ever live in my whole entire life. ive me new people made new friends, found out how some people really feel about me and how some act when push comes to shove. this year i have found out who my true friends are, thank god for that... this year has been so good already it feels like i can just float away on a dream cloud, and pray nothing stops me. even if something bad does come my way, all the good things that i have done already and all the fun things will just over power that bad entity and itll be alright. i have a special thanks to one person, if you see this youll know who you are, just some secrets are better left unsaid, but we both know who you are, thank you. and im letting go of all my lonely yseterdays along with the person that has hurt me the most, im letting you go like the year of 2008, ill seeya around....till next time

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love

love<3

finally...

it was hard...it was tough...it took me a long time to realize the truth and admit to it...





im finally free...



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thats the way it goes

ive come to realize in this so called game of life, you need to live it to the fullest, and be the happiest you can be, sure people that you call friends will come and go, and groups you think that will be together forever as homies will crash and burn... sometimes its not the people you meet but the people you choose to be around. at times there are things i can not make happen or vise versa, but i just hope that everyone will calm down and be together one more time...


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yall can't roll like us

"Go to law's blog"



WHAT AN EPIC NIGHT...


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Family

I have learned family is only what you make of it, today has brought what family really is to my eyes, and how much someone can have an impact on on persons life, sure i might get mad at my mom, and yes she used to pull some shady stuff on me back in the day, but i will never leave her alone or just never talk to her again, i might not be living with her soon, but i bet there wont be a moment or second of the day i wont be worried sick about her and especially in the condition shes in. these past few days i havent gone to sleep till 5:30-6AM im so stressed out about whats going to happen, this is one time in my life i can say i am honestly scared and lost. im just thankful that i have people who will take me in and are willing to put a roof over my head, without you guys i dont know what i would do. but i know deep down that this situation soon will be over and my family will once again be together under one roof...if you hear me lord, please give me a break <3



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when will i catch a break

damn, does god ever let me catch a break in this life?...

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lies...

wow, its only the first month of this new so called fresh start of a year for our friendship. that was your idea remember? lets start fresh and make new mistakes and let the past burn? well your sure doing an awesome job at the making new mistakes part...i know its not my right, but it als isnt your right to keep feeding me all these lies,...


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late nights and music

well well well hello again, tonight is like any other night at home, one word to describe it "BORING" yes boring, i sit here sniffling my nose and staring at my computer screen with a pretty purple background trying to find something to do with my spare time rather than sit at my computer, now that i reminisce on today, it was pretty cool that i got to see my friends today and just kick it with them for a little while and also go to eat at home town buffet with some of them, i realize how much fun i have with them and how random we are haha. but im so thankful for all of those who care about me and the homies that are there for me when i really need you guys, dont forget i got your back whenever you need it. thank you all!


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when will i ever learn?

when will i ever learn that some people will just never think of you first?, no matter what you do, no matter what you say, no matter how many favors you do for them, their intent is to just fill you in with the missing spots of their dead time when its the most convenient for them. this will be a lesson that i need to learn to say now or never...to all my close homies and friends, you know who im talking about....till i get used again...payce....


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finally!!

well, phew thats a lot of work at the computer, this has been my 3rd reformat in 2 weeks for my PC, i guess i just dont have as much luck as i did back when i first got this bad boy. haha for some reason i keep getting epic fails with these new programs, but not today not today, haha i finally got an up to date ant-virus protection! well yeah, today was just the same ol thing, wake up, chill with mom for a bit, eat, computer, haha i bet tomorrow im going to do it all over again. well not to much was done today except getting my computer back up and running once again. its like a car, race it, break it, re-build it, aha. well till next time kiddos..PAYCE


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same ol same ol

WELL WELL WELL, another day of chillin haha, damn i really need spring quarter to roll around so i can get up off my lazy ass and get on with life...

its pretty funny how right when something goes wrong, but both things that were going wrong before are going right again and it tears you apart, sometimes i think life is plotting an evil scheme against me to make me try and quit, well i gotta be strong and actually look at the whole picture instead of just living my old way of taking it day by day, its time for me to stand back and look beyond the next 24 hours of my life...

sometimes i wonder when people say something if they really know what they are saying or if they really mean it, or if they are doing it on purpose just to mess around with you, i look at them and think is this real? its amazing how after years and years of flaking/being flaked on im still not used to it, you would think if someone had something done to them or has done it enough times they wouldnt mind it, well maybe an ordinary person would but not me,

i see people around me getting little material objects just because...i keep thinking in my head if i am a good person ill get rewarded aswell, it might not be with a car, or a new computer, but i know in the end i will be rewarded...

LIFE IS CONFUSING...

IM GETTING PUSHED TO THE LIMIT.

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wooo what a day

haha well today my fingers are raw and red, but at the end it was all worth while =] i made this really cool swan, ill show you a pic later, but anyway today, was just whatevers, chilled with my mom and she took me to eat at Red Robin =] omg i forgot how good the fries are at that place, especially with their special seasoning stuff YUM YUM! then we went to michaels where my mom bought the wooden dragon kit and i bought the swan kit, then we came home and i created my bueatiful swan, and now im here..well till next time...PAYCE!

^^^ the swan =]


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hmmm monday days/nights

well today was pretty funnn haha went to the all classy mcdonalds with the best friend! you know who you are haha, thank you for the big mac meal you quick eater =]...i need to seriously find something more productive to do than to just sit here and do blogs all day and play some computer games that i know just waste some time.

on a more happy note, me having nothing to do has led me to keeping my house pretty clean haha....and yes now im just ranting, got nothing more to say so till next time. PAYCE!!!


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new comer

well well well, ive finally come down to this, haha this totally reminds me of xanga just like version II status haha, its pretty late tonight so i wont be saying much except ive come to the darkside of blogging X_X well gnite all...


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